Kamala Harris flew halfway around the world to deliver one of the most baffling, incoherent speeches of her post-White House career—and that’s saying something. Billed as a surprise “power guest” at the 2025 Australasian Real Estate Conference, Harris proceeded to give a TED Talk that no one asked for, about… everything but real estate.
You Know It’s Bad When Real Estate Agents Are Begging for a Mortgage Rate Lecture
More than 4,000 real estate professionals packed the Gold Coast event expecting insights into housing trends or interest rate forecasts. Instead, they got a disjointed monologue about Elon Musk, women’s reproductive health, her mom, Playboy magazine, the 1930s, and the meaning of humility. Harris made “word salad” sound like a generous description. If this was a pitch to run for governor of California, she might want to consider a new speechwriter—or maybe just a translator.
“I Eat No for Breakfast” and Other Hallmark Card Gibberish
In classic Kamala fashion, she dropped a few recycled catchphrases that had the audience wondering if she was glitched. Gems like “I eat no for breakfast” and “being unburdened by what has been” returned like bad leftovers. One attendee said she “lost focus every time” Harris tried to answer a question. Another attendee politely called it “somewhat inspiring for women”—which is Aussie for “we smiled because we were confused and trapped.”
From West Wing to Word Salad Bar
This isn’t new behavior—it’s Harris’s brand. Remember her speeches during the campaign trail? The ones where she’d string together buzzwords and motivational fluff like she was beta-testing ChatGPT? The only difference is that now she’s delivering the same recycled gibberish on a different continent. It’s like watching someone press shuffle on a TED Talk playlist while blindfolded.
Liberals Keep Pushing Harris Like She’s Not a Political Punchline
You’d think after the 2024 election loss, the Democrats might quietly retire Kamala’s speaking career. But nope—they’re still propping her up like a broken lawn chair at a Labor Day BBQ. Booking her at a real estate conference was supposed to make her look “global” and “in-demand.” Instead, it made her look confused, disconnected, and deeply unemployed. Which she literally is, by the way—she even said it onstage.
Elon Musk Got Dragged In for No Reason, Again
Somehow, Harris even managed to throw shade at Elon Musk. Because why not? He’s the left’s favorite dartboard. One moment she’s talking about Gen Z housing problems, and the next she’s pivoting to Musk like she’s checking off a Twitter beef checklist. What Musk has to do with Australian real estate is anyone’s guess—but hey, at least it distracted from the rest of the nonsense.
The Left’s Talent for Elevating Losers is Truly Awe-Inspiring
Let’s be honest: Kamala Harris has never won a national race. She dropped out of the 2020 primary before her own state voted. She was Joe Biden’s diversity checkbox, not a rising star. And yet here we are, watching the Democratic bench send her to international events as if she’s still relevant. They treat losing like a qualification—as long as you check the right intersectional boxes.
If This Is What “Speaking Truth” Looks Like, Pass the Earplugs
At one point, Harris gave a bizarre lesson on humility: “I don’t aspire to be humble. And I don’t recommend it.” Translation? She thinks humility is beneath her—but wants credit for pretending to understand it. Combine that with her frequent use of phrases like “passage of time” and “what can be,” and you start to wonder if she’s speaking in code only her interns understand.
The Real Estate Crowd Deserved Better
The crowd came for substance. They got soap bubbles. No market analysis. No economic outlook. No housing forecasts. Just Kamala Harris talking about her childhood, magazine covers, and the “importance of friendships” in foreign policy. Even the moderator looked like he was trying to mentally Photoshop himself into another dimension.
Democrats Talk About Unity—Then Book Harris to Speak
There’s a reason the political divide is growing wider. The Left sends Kamala Harris to a housing event and then pretends she’s a symbol of competence. She’s not. She’s a meme in heels. While the world teeters on the edge of inflation, interest rate hikes, and housing collapses, Harris is over here doing slam poetry about the Great Depression. Tell me again how this is supposed to unify anyone?
Final Thoughts: You Can’t Spell “Leadership” Without Laughing at Kamala
In a sane world, this would be the end of Harris’s global speaking tour. But we all know better. She’ll be back on another stage soon, repeating the same five buzzwords, talking in circles, and saying absolutely nothing with maximum conviction. Because that’s the Democrat brand now: optics over outcomes, slogans over substance.
And if you ever feel like you’re not making sense, just remember—you’re still more coherent than Kamala Harris with a microphone and no teleprompter.
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JIMMY
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